幽默的爆笑英文笑话大全

发布时间:2017-05-15 16:29

民间笑话是一种颇受人们喜爱的民间叙事类型,材料丰富,有广泛的现实基础。但是它却一直被学界视为不登大雅之堂的小众,研究工作相对薄弱。小编整理了幽默的爆笑英文笑话,欢迎阅读!

幽默的爆笑英文笑话:A Whole Hour 整整一小时

Mr. Brown arrived for work an hour late. His clothes were torn and tattered1. He was banged and bruised2, and he had one arm in a sling3. His boss was purple with rage.

"It's ten o'clock," screamed the boss, "you were supposed to be here at nine. What happened?"

"I'm sorry," explained Mr. Brown, "I fell out of ten-story window."

"That took you a whole hour?"

布朗先生上班整整迟到了一小时,他衣衫不整,浑身青紫,一只胳膊上还打着绷带。他的老板怒火冲天。

“现在已经十点了,”老板咆哮着,“你九点钟就应该来的。到底发生了什么事?”

“对不起,”布朗先生解释道,“我从10层楼的窗户里摔下去了。”

“难道那也要用整整一个小时吗?”

幽默的爆笑英文笑话:死亡讣告

The phone rang in the obituary department of the local newspaper. "How much does it cost to have an obituaryprinted"? asked the woman.

地方报社负责刊登死亡讣告的部门电话响了。“登一篇讣告多少钱?”一位女士问。

"It's five dollars a word, ma'am," the clerk replied politely. "Fine," said the woman after a moment."Got a pencil?" "Yes ma'am." "Got some paper?""Yes ma'am."

“五美元一个字,太太。”书记员礼貌地回答。“好的,”女士沉默了一小会儿,“拿着笔呢吗?”“是的,夫人。”“纸呢?”“是的,夫人。”

"Okay, write this down: 'Cohen dead'." "That's all?" asked the clerk disbelievingly. "That's it." "I'm sorry ma'am, I should have told you - there's a five word minimum."

“好的,这样写:‘科恩去世了’”“就这些了?”书记员疑惑地问道。“对,就这些。”“很抱歉,夫人,我刚才没有告诉您,在我们这登讣告最少也得五个字。”

"Yes, you should've," snapped the woman. Now let me think a minute... okay, got a pencil?" "Yes ma'am.""Got some paper?" "Yes, ma'am." "Okay, here goes: 'Cohen dead. Cadillac for Sale.'"

“没错,你就应该告诉我,”女士有点生气了,“现在我得考虑一下,嗯…拿着笔呢吗?”“是的,夫人。”“纸呢?”“是的,夫人。”“好的,这样写:‘科恩去世了,出售一辆卡迪拉克轿车。’”

幽默的爆笑英文笑话:没问题

A bald man took a seat in a beauty shop.

一个秃头的男人坐在理发店里。

"How can I help you?" asked the stylist. "I went for a hair transplant," the guy explained, "but Icouldn't stand the pain.

发型师问:“有什么可以帮你吗?”那个人解释说:“我本来要去做头发移植,但实在太疼了。

If you can make my hair look like yours without causing me any discomfort, I'll pay you$5,000."

如果你能够让我的头发看起来像你的一样,而且没有任何痛苦,我将付给你5000美元。”

"No problem," said the stylist, and he quickly shaved his head.

“没问题,”发型师说,然后他很快帮自己剃了个光头。

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