浅显易懂的英语笑话阅读

发布时间:2017-05-02 17:45

笑话是日常生活中人们消遣娱乐的一种常见语言现象,其目的在于在会话过程中传递和激发幽默感。这种幽默感能够改善人们生活或工作的气氛,让大家更放松。小编精心收集了浅显易懂的英语笑话,供大家欣赏学习!

浅显易懂的英语笑话:George Washington

TEACHER: "George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now do you know why his father didn't punish him?" STUDENT: "Because he still had the ax in his hand?"

浅显易懂的英语笑话:Teenagers

A person who can't remember to walk the dog but never forgets a phone number.

A weight watcher who goes on a diet by giving up candy bars before breakfast.

A youngster who receives her allowance on Monday, spends it on Tuesday, and borrows it from her best friend on Wednesday.

Someone who can hear his favorite singer 3 blocks away but not his mother calling from the next room.

A whiz who can operate the latest computer without a lesson but can't make a bed.

A student who spends 12 minutes studying history and 12 hours studying for her driver'slicense.

A connoisseur of 2 kinds of fine music loud and very loud.

An enthusiast who has the energy to bike for miles but is usually too tired to dry the dishes.

A young woman who loves the cat and tolerates the brother.

A romantic who never falls in love more than once a week.

A budding beauty who never smiles until her braces come off.

A boy who can sleep till noon on any Saturday he suspects the lawn needs mowing.

An original thinker who is positive that her mother was never a teenager.

浅显易懂的英语笑话:Grace before eating

TEACHER: Now, Sam, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?

SAM: No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good cook.

浅显易懂的英语笑话:Writing in the dark

CHILD: Dad, can you write in the dark?

FATHER: I think so. What do you want me to write?

CHILD: Your name on this report card.

浅显易懂的英语笑话:Science answers

Answers to Questions on Science Tests

By 5th and 6th graders:

The spinal column is a long bunch of bones. The head sits on the top, and you sit on the bottom.

A city purifies its water supply by filtering the water and then forcing it through anaviator.

The inhabitants of Moscow are Mosquitoes.

It is so hot in some places that people there have to live in other places.

Momentum is something you give a person when they go away.

Mushrooms always grow in damp places which is why they look like umbrellas.

The four seasons are salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.

The alimentary canal is located in the northern part of Indiana.

Thunder is a rich source of loudness.

Some people can tell what time it is by looking at the sun, but I never have been able to make out the numbers.

In some rocks you can find the fossil footprints of fishes.

When planets run around and around in circles, we say they are orbiting. When people do it, we say they are crazy.

One of the main causes of dust is janitors.

For asphyxiation, apply artificial respiration until the victim is dead.

Blood circulates through the body by flowing down one leg and up the other.

A monsoon is a French gentleman.

The word "trousers" is an uncommon noun because it is singular at the top andplural at the bottom.

Rain is saved up in cloud banks.

To keep milk from turning sour, keep it in the cow.

Genetics explains why you look like your father, and if you don't, why you should.

Water vapor gets together in a big cloud. When it gets big enough to be called a drop, it does.

There is a tremendous weight pushing down on the center of the Earth because so many people are stomping around there these days.

The cause of perfume disappearing is evaporation. Evaporation gets blamed for a lot of things people forget to put the top on.

You can listen to thunder and tell how close you came to getting hit. If you don't hear it, you got hit, so never mind.

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