近年来,冷笑话作为一种新兴的语言现象在网络、杂志上十分盛行。小编精心收集了英文笑话故事短文，供大家欣赏学习!

英文笑话故事短文：ONLY A FEW WORDS

At a court the judge is interrogating a mugger but gets into difficulty because the mugger is a foreigner who doesn't speak English. "Don't you speak English at all?" the judge asks. "Only a few words," replies the mugger.

"What words do you know?"

"Your purse or your life!"

几个英语词

法庭上法官正审问一个抢劫犯，由于该犯是一个不会说英语的外国人，审问很困难。"你一点英语都不会说吗?"法官问。"我只会说几个词。"抢劫犯回答。

"你会说哪几个词?"

"你是要钱还是要命!"

英文笑话故事短文：DON'T BE SELFISH

A mother is admonishing her son.

----Now, John, don't be selfish. Let your little brother share the bicycle with you.

----But Mother, I do. I ride it down the hill, and he rides it up the hill.

别太自私

一位母亲在劝告她的儿子。

"听着，约翰，别太自私，让你的弟弟和你共用一辆自行车。"

"妈妈，我是让他。我先骑下坡，他再骑上坡。"

英文笑话故事短文：BUYING A HAT

A lady went to a hat shop to buy a hat. As she was very fussy, it took her a long time to pick on one. Already at the end of his patience the salesman was afraid that she might change her mind again so he tried to flatter her: "An excellent choice, madam. You look at least ten years younger with this hat on!" To his dismay, the lady took off her hat at once and said: "I don't want a hat that makes me look ten years older as soon as I take it off. Show me some more hats!"

买帽子

一位妇女到一家帽子店买帽子。她很挑剔，用了很长时间才选好了一顶。已经忍耐到极限的售货员害怕她再改变主意，便恭维她："你做了极好的选择，夫人。你戴上这顶帽子看上去起码年轻十岁!"但令他沮丧的是，这位女士马上摘下了她的帽子说："我不想要一顶摘下来便使我立刻显得老十岁的帽子。多拿一些帽子给我看看!"

英文笑话故事短文：MONEY AND FRIENDS

A: Which do you find more important, money or friends?

B: Friends, of course.

A: Why?

B: I can always borrow money from friends.

钱和朋友

甲：你认为钱和朋友哪一个更重要?

乙：当然是朋友。

甲：为什么?

乙：我总可以从朋友那儿借到钱。

英文笑话故事短文：I CAN GO HOME.

One day after school the teacher said to his students, "Tomorrow morning, if any one of you can answer my first question, I will permit him or her to go home

earlier." The next day, when the teacher came into the classroom, he found the blackboard daubed. He was very angry and asked, "Who did it? Please stand up!" "It's me," said Bob, "Now, I can go home. Good-bye, Sir."

我可以回家了

一天，放学以后，老师对他的学生们说："明天上午，如果你们当中的任何一个同学能首先回答我的问题，我就准许他或她最先回家。"第二天，老师走进教室时发现黑板被涂得乱七八糟，他非常生气的问："谁涂的?请站起来!"鲍勃说："先生，是我，现在我可以回家了，再见!"