地道英语笑话三则

发布时间:2017-03-21 15:34

地道英语笑话1：

"For the last time, I don't want any insurance ! " said the harassed householder to the salesman

“这是最后一次了，我不要买任何保险!”被骚扰的房主对推销员说道。

"Just a moment, sir. Please consider this :Just last month I sold a policy to a man much like yourself.

“等一会儿，先生，请您仔细考虑一下：上个月有一位先生长得跟你很像，他刚买了一份保险，

The very next day his house caught fire. The house was completely gutted.

隔天他家就着火，房子内部全都被烧毁，

To save himself, he had to leap from an upstairs window; he landed on his own car, went through the roof, broke both his legs and an arm. ""Well, he was one of the lucky ones, wasn't he?"

为了保住性命，他从楼上窗户跳下来，恰巧落在他的汽车上，穿过车顶，他摔断了两条腿和一只手臂。”

“喔!他就是你所说的幸运人士中的一个，不是吗?”

地道英语笑话三则

地道英语笑话2：

A Jew, an Indian and a black were lined up to enter the Kingdom of Heaven.

一位犹太人、一位印第安人和一位黑人列队进入天国之门。

Said the Jew to St. Peter, 66 Frankly, I'm rather surprised to be here. All my life Christians have despised and reviled me. "

那位犹太人对圣彼得说：“坦白讲，能到这里让我蛮惊讶的，我一辈子一直都受到基督徒的轻视和侮辱。”

"That's a great sorrow to us," said St. Peter, "but you won-t find that kind of prejudice here. Here, all are truly equal. Just spell God and you may enter. "

“我们实在感到非常遗憾，”圣彼得说，“但我们这里没有那样的偏见，这里每个人都完全平等，只要拼出G。d这个词你就能进入天堂。”

Next,the Indian came forward and said,"St.Peter,all my life I suffered from poverty anddiscrimination,and could only live in a reservation.Will I truly be free here?"

那名犹太人正确地拼出 God后，被招入门内。接着印第安人走向前说道“圣彼得，我一辈子饱受贫穷和种族歧视的打击，而且只能住在居留地内，我在这里能得到真正的自由吗?”

"My son, your troubles are over. Just spell the word God you will be free as a bird. "

“小兄弟，你的烦恼已经结束了，只要拼出God这个词，你就能像小鸟一样自由自在。”

The Indian obliged and he, too, entered the Heavenly Kingdom.

印第安人照着做，不久也被引入天堂。

Next, the black man strode forward. "St. Peter," he said, "all my life people looked down on me and treated me unfairly. That won't happen here, will it?"

接着那名黑人跨步向前，“圣彼得，”他说道，“一辈子人们都瞧不起我，不公平对待我，在这里那些事不会发生吧!”

"Of course not, my boy. We don't do that kind of thing here. Just spell" onomatopoeia "and the Kingdom of Heaven is yours "

“当然不会，我的弟兄，我们不会做那样的事，只要拼出onomatopoeia这个词，天堂之国就是你的了!”

地道英语笑话3：

A lawyer finds himself at the Pearly Gates at the same time as the pope.

一位律师发现他和某教宗一起到达天堂的珍珠门，

Both men are allowed to enter heaven,

两个人都被允许进入天堂。

and the lawyer is ensconced in a magnificent mansion.

律师被安置在一间豪华的别墅，

But he sees that the pope is housed in a far more humble dwelling.

但他却见到教宗被安排住在非常简陋的住所。

Unable to restrain his curiosity,the lawyer asks St.Peter about it.

由于好奇心的驱使，律师问圣彼得其中原委。

“Well, you see,” replies St. Peter, "we have dozens of popes up here, but we-ve never had a lawyer before. "

“哦，你看我们这里有好几十位教宗，可是你却是第一个上天堂的律师呢!”圣彼得答道。

以上就是小编为大家带来的地道英语笑话三则，希望大家喜欢!