笑话是民族文化不可或缺的一部分。透过笑话我们可以看到一个民族的生存环境、生活方式、社会关系和心理特征等等。小编精心收集了大学英语小笑话短文，供大家欣赏学习!

大学英语小笑话短文：All In the family

都在这一家

Eight-year-old Sally brought her report card home from school .

八十岁大的 莎莉从学校把她的成绩报告卡带回家。

Her marks were good mostly .

她的成绩不错，

A's and a couple of B'S .

大部分都是A，还有几个B。

However ,her teacher had written across the bottom,

可是， 她韵老师在卡片下方写道：

"SALLY is a smart little girl,but she has one fault,

“莎莉是个聪明的小女孩，但是她有一个毛病。

she talks too much in school.I have an idea I am going to try,

她在学校太爱讲话。我有一个想法我要来试试看，

which I think may break her of the bad habit."

我认为.这个想法可能会让她改掉这个坏习惯。”

Sally's dad signed her report card,

莎莉的爸爸签了她的学习报告卡，

putting a note on the back ,

并在卡片背面注记：

"Please let me know if your idea work on SALLY

“如果你的想法对莎莉很有效，请你让我知道，

because I would like to try it out on her mother."

因为我想要把它试用在她妈妈身上。

大学英语小笑话短文：If only

倘若

A man is driving up a steep,narrow mountain road .

有个男人驾着车沿着一条又陡峭又窄小的山路往上开。

A woman is driving down the same road .

有个女人沿着同一条路往下开着车。

As they pass ench other ,

当他们彼此错车时，

the woman leans out of the window and yells"PI!!"

这个女人斜靠着车窗向外太喊：“猪!”

The man immediately leans out of his window and replies, "BITCH!!"

这个男人立刻也斜靠着他的车窗向外大声响应：“臭女人.!”

They each continue on their way ,

他们各自继续开车上路，

and as the man ronds the next corner ,

当这个男人绕到下一个转弯处的时候，

he crashes into a pig in the middle of road .

他竞撞上了在路中央的一只猪。

If only men would listen.

倘若男人会听话就没事了。

大学英语小笑话短文：The visit to the doctor

拜访医师

A Man asked his doctor if he thought he'd live to be a hundred .

一个男人问他的医师是否认为他会活到一百岁。

The doctor asked the man ,"Do you smoke or drink ?"

医师问这个男人：“你抽烟或喝酒吗?”

" No ,"he replied , "I have never done either ."

他回答说：“不，我从不抽烟喝酒。”

" Do you gamble,drive fast cars ,and fool around with woman?" inquired the doctor .

医师问说：“你赌博、开快车、玩女人吗?”

"No,I have done any of those things either."

“不，我也从不干那些事情。”

"Well then," said the doctor ," what do you want to live to be a hundred for?"

医师说：“那你干吗要活到一百岁呀?”