笑话以其短小的篇幅,洗练的文笔,幽默的情节,独有的魅力吸引着我们每一个人,成为大家茶余饭后的调味剂。下面是小编带来的非常短的英语笑话，欢迎阅读!

非常短的英语笑话篇一

Difference 区别

"I can always tell a graduate class from an undergraduate class," observed the instructor in one of my graduate engineering courses at California State University in Los Angeles.

"When I say, 'Good afternoon,' the undergraduates respond, 'Good afternoon." But the graduate students just write it down."

“研究生班和本科生很容易就能区别开来，”在洛杉矶加利福利亚州立大学给我们研究生上工程学课的老师如此说。

“我说‘下午好’，本科生们回答说‘下午好’。研究生们则把我说的话记在笔记本上。”

非常短的英语笑话篇二

Big Head 大脑袋

"All the kids make fun of me," the boy cried to his mother, "They say I have a big head."

"Don't listen to them," his mother comforted him, "You have a beautiful head. Now stop crying and go to the store for ten pounds of potatoes."

"Where's the shopping bag?"

"I haven't got one, use your hat."

“所有的孩子都拿我开玩笑，”小男孩哭着跟妈妈说：“他们说我长了一个大脑袋。”

“别听他们的，”他妈妈安慰说：“你的脑袋长得很漂亮。好了，别哭了，去商店买10磅土豆来。”

“购物袋在哪?”

“我没有购物袋，就用你的帽子吧。”

非常短的英语笑话篇三

Three Surgeons

Three famous surgeons were bragging about(吹嘘，炫耀) their skills. "A man came to me who had his hand cut off," said one. "Today that man is a concert violinist(小提琴家) ." "That's nothing," said another. "A guy came to me who had his legs cut off. I stitched(缝纫，装订)them back on, and today that man is a marathon runner."

"I can top both of you," said the third. "One day I came on the scene of a terrible accident. There was nothing left but a horse's posterior(后部，臀部) - and a pair of glasses. Today that man is seated in United States Senate."

三个有名的外科医生正在吹嘘他们的技术，“一个人断了一只手，他来找我，”一个说，“如今那个人是个音乐会的小提琴手。”

“这算不了什么，”另一个说，“一个家伙两条腿断了，他来找我，我将它们接了回去。如今，那人是马拉松选手。”

“我比你们两个都强，”第三个说，“一天，我碰到一起可怕的车祸，除了一个马屁股，和一幅眼睛，什么都没有留下。如今，那人坐在美国参议院里。”

非常短的英语笑话篇四

If you refuse to marry me, he swore, I shall die. She refused him. Sixty years later, he died.

如果你不答应嫁给我，他发誓，我就要去死。 她拒绝了他。 六十年后，他死了。

He Swore to Die 他曾发誓要死

非常短的英语笑话篇五

Good wishes 良好的心愿

One day a boy came to his teacher and said: Teacher, pa wants to know if you like roast(烘烤) pig.

I certainly do, said the teacher, and you tell your father he is very kind to think of me.

Days passed, and nothing more was said about the roast pig.

Finally the teacher said to the boy: I thought your father was going to send me over some roast pig.

Yes, said the boy, he did intend to, but the pig got well.

一天有个男孩去对他老师说：老师，我爸想知道你是不是爱吃烤猪肉。

当然啰，老师说，去告诉你父亲，多谢他想着我。

好几天过去了，再没提起烤猪肉的事儿。

最后老师对男孩说：我以为你父亲要给我送点烤猪肉来呢。

是啊，孩子说，他是这么想的，可后来猪又没病了。