冷笑话是一种新兴的语言现象,也是一种出现在我们身边的不可忽视的新的语言现象。冷笑话不同于一般笑话,它以其独特的制笑机制,能瞬间创造出一种特殊的氛围。小编分享英语笑话短文带翻译，希望可以帮助大家!

英语笑话短文带翻译：I didn't do it 我什么也没做

One day a man came home from work to find total chaos in the house. The kids were laying outside in the mud, still in their pajamas.

When he opened the door, he found an even bigger mess: dishes on the counter, dog food spilled on the floor, a broken glass under the table and a pile of sand by the back door. The family room was strewn with toys, and a lamp had been knocked over.

He headed up the stairs, stepping over toys, to look for his wife. He was becoming worried that she might be ill or that something terrible had happened to her.

He found her in the bedroom still in bed with her pajamas on, reading a magazine.

She looked up at him, smiled and asked how his day had gone.

He looked at her, bewildered(困惑的), and asked, "What happened here today?"

She again smiled and answered, "You know, every day, you come home from work and ask me what I did today."

"Yes," was his reply.

She answered, "Well, today, I didn't do it!"

一天，一个人下班回到家，发现屋子外面一片狼籍。孩子们还穿着睡衣，满身是泥地躺在外面。

打开房门，他发现屋子里面更乱。橱柜上堆着盘子，地上散落着狗食，桌子下面有一只打碎的玻璃杯，后门旁还有一堆沙子。家庭娱乐室里堆满了玩具，还有一盏灯翻倒在地上。

他迈过散落在楼梯上的玩具，上楼去找他的妻子。他开始担心她生病了或是发生了什么可怕的事情。

他发现她还穿着睡衣躺在床上，在看一本杂志。

她抬头看到他，笑着问他今天过得怎么样。

他看着她，困惑地问：“今天发生什么事情了?”

她笑着问道：“你每天下班回家都会问我今天做什么了。”

“没错啊，”他说。

她说：“是这样的，今天，我没做什么!”

英语笑话短文带翻译：You forget again 你又忘了

An 80-year-old couple were having problems remembering things, so they decided to go to their doctor to get checked out to make sure nothing was wrong with them.

After checking the couple out, the doctor told them they were physically okay but might want to start writing all the things down and make notes to help them remember things. The couple thanked the doctor and left .

Later that night while watching TV, the old man got up from his chair and his wife asked, "where are you going?" he replied, "To the kitchen." she asked, "Will you get a bowl of ice cream?" He replied, "Sure." She then asked him, "Don't you think you should write it down so you can remember it?" He said "No, I can remember that." She then said, "Well, I also would like some strawberries on top. You had better write that down because I know you'll forget that." He said, "I can remember that, you want a bowl of ice cream with strawberries." She replied, "Well, I also would like whip cream on top, I know you will forget that so you'd better write it down." Withirritation in his voice, he said, "I don't need to write that down, I can remember that," He thenfumed into the kitchen. After about 30 minutes he returned from the kitchen and handed her a plate of bacon and eggs. She stared at the plate for a moment and said, "You forget my toast."

一对八十岁的老夫妇记性不好，于是决定到医生那里检查，担心哪里有什么毛病。

医生检查完后告诉他们体检正常，只是为了帮助记忆，他们可以把想做的事用笔记下来。老夫妇谢过医生后就回家了。

晚上看着看着电视，老头站起身来，老太太问：“你去哪儿啊?”老头回答：“去厨房。”老太太接着问：“带一盘冰激凌来，好吗?”老头说：“没问题。”老太太说：“难道不用写下来?这样你就不会忘记了?”老头说：“不用了，我记得住。”老太太又说：“那好，我还想在冰激凌上放点草莓。你最好记下来，我想你记不住的。”老头回答：“忘不了，你要的是一盘草莓冰激凌。”老太太还说：“我还想在顶上再放点奶油，我知道你记不住，还是写下来吧。”老头有点儿烦了，说：“用不着写，我能记住。”老头气愤地走进厨房。大概过了三十分钟，老头回来递给老伴一盘熏肉和鸡蛋。老太太盯着盘子