英语冷笑话具有强大的生命力,它一般不会使读者在听到或者读到之后立即发笑,而往往会停顿一下才能明白其中的幽默点。小编整理了有关幽默英语笑话，欢迎阅读!

有关幽默英语笑话：The smart little boy

聪明的小男孩

Stranger: "What's your name, little boy?"

Little boy: "I don't konw."

Stranger: "How does your mother call you when the cakes are done?"

Boy: "She doesn't call me, I am there already."

陌生人：“小男孩，你的的名字叫什么?”

小男孩：“我不知道。”

陌生人：“你妈妈在做好蛋糕时，是怎么叫你的?”

小男孩：“他没有叫我，我早就在那里了。"

有关幽默英语笑话：Don't Worry Mommy!

One day there was this little girl who always wore a dress to school. Every day she would sit on the bench and cry. Finally Little Johnny asked her why she was crying. She replied "I don't have any money for potato chips." Johnny said "I'll give you money if you climb that tree over there."

"Okay!" said the little girl. So she climbed the tree with a lot of little boys around her. She got down and he gave her money. This kept continuing for several days. Her mother got suspicious and asked her "Where do you get the money for these potato chips?" The little girl replied "From the boys at school. They give me money if I climb the tree."

"Don't do that honey! All the boys want to do is look up your skirt and see your underwear."

The next day the little girl cried again and Johnny gave her money for climbing the tree. This time there was a bigger crowd than usual. When the little girl came home she had a bag of potato chips. The mother said "Honey! I told you not to climb up the tree! The boys only want to look at your underwear."

The little girl said "Don't worry mommy! I didn't wear any underwear today!"

有关幽默英语笑话：Slug jokes

What did the slug say to the other who had hit him and run off?

I'll get you next slime!

What was the snail doing on the highway?

About one mile a day!

What is the definition of a slug?

A snail with a housing problem!

What did the slug say as he slipped down the wall?

How slime flies!

How do you know your kitchen floor is dirty?

The slugs leave a trail on the floor that reads "clean me"!

What do you do when two snails have a fight?

Leave them to slug it out!

What is the difference between school dinners and a pile of slugs?

School dinners come on a plate!

How do snails get their shells so shiny?

They use snail varnish!

Where do you find giant snails?

At the end of giants fingers!

Why is the snail the strongest animal?

Because he carries a house on his back!

有关幽默英语笑话：Its His Fault 是他的错

Billy and Bobby were brothers, and they often had fights with each other.

Last Saturday their mother said to them, "I'm going to cook our lunch now. Go out and play in the garden - and be good."

"Yes, Mummy." the two boys answered, and they went out.

They played in the garden for half an hour, and then Billy ran into the kitchen, "Mummy, " he said, "Bobby's broken a window in Mrs. Allens' house."

"He's a bad boy," his mother said. "How did he break it?"

"I threw a stone at him," Billy answered,"and he quickly ducked.".

比利和波比是两兄弟，两人经常打架。

上个星期六，他们的妈妈对他们说：“我现在要做午饭了。去，到花园去玩吧，别淘气。”

“是，妈妈。”两个男孩回答，然后他们就出去了。

他们在花园里玩了半个小时，然后比利跑进了厨房。“妈妈，”他说：“ 波比打碎了艾伦太太家的窗玻璃。”

“他是个坏孩子。”他妈妈说。“他是怎么把玻璃打碎的?”

“我朝他扔了一块石子，”比利回答：“他蹲下了。”

有关幽默英语笑话：To Buy a Video

Amos asked his mother whether they could have a video.

"I’m afraid we can’t afford one," sighed his mother.

But on the following day in came Amos, staggering beneath the weight of a brand-new video.

"How on earth did you pay for that?" gasped his mother.

"Easy, Mum." replied Amos, "I sold the television!"

买录像机

艾莫斯问妈妈他们是否能买一台录像机。

“恐怕我们还买不起，”妈妈叹息着说。

可第二天当艾莫斯回来时，他摇摇晃晃地搬着一台全新的录像机。

“你究竟是哪儿来的钱买这东西?”妈妈大吃一惊，喘着气说。

“妈妈，这简单，”艾曼斯回答。“我把电视机给卖了!”