冷笑话是近几年才出现的新兴语言现象，它以网络为主要的传播方式。本文是有关于英语笑话短文，希望对大家有帮助!

有关于英语笑话短文：绅士 A Gentleman

Dick was seven years old, and his sister, Catherine, was five. One day their mother took themto their aunt's house to play while she went to the big city to buy some new clothes.

迪克年龄七岁，他的妹妹凯瑟琳五岁。一天，妈妈把他们带到姨妈家去玩，自己就到大城市去买些新的衣服。

The children played for an hour, and then at half past four their aunt took Dick into thekitchen. She gave him a nice cake and a knife and said to him, "Now here's a knife, Dick. Cutthis cake in half and give one of the pieces to your sister, but remember to do it like agentleman."

孩子们玩了个把小时，在四点半的时候，姨妈领着迪克走进了厨房。她交给迪克一块精美的蛋糕和一把刀子，并对他说：“喏，迪克，给你刀子，把这块蛋糕一切为二，给你妹妹一块。不过，你得记住要做得像一个绅士那样。”

"Like a gentleman?" Dick asked. "How do gentlemen do it?"

迪克问：“像一个绅士?绅士怎样做呢?”

"They always give the bigger piece to the other person." answered his aunt at once.

他姨妈马上回答说：“绅士总是把大的一块让给别人的。”

"Oh" said Dick. He thought about this for a few seconds. Then he took the cake to his sisterand said to her,"Cut this cake in half, Catherine.".

迪克说了一声“噢”。他对此想了一会，然后，他把蛋糕拿给妹妹，并对她说：“凯瑟琳，你来把这块蛋糕一切为二吧。”

有关于英语笑话短文：同义词=骂人

One day a ten-year-old child asked his mother, "Mom, what is a synonym?" "What? You evendon't know what a synonym is? How foolish you are. When I describe you as foolish, I meanyou're silly, stupid. Now you know what a synonym is ?" "Yes, a synonym is using badlanguage." The child concluded.

一天， 一个10岁的孩子问母亲："妈，什么是同义词?" "你说什么?竟然连同义词都不懂!真是个笨蛋。我说你是个笨蛋，就是说你是个傻瓜，是个蠢货。你现在明白同义词的意思了吗?" "明白了。同义词就是骂人。"

有关于英语笑话短文：实际年龄

The teacher noticed that Johnny had been daydreaming for a long time. She decided to get hisattention. "Johnny," she said, "If the world is 25,000 miles around and eggs are sixty cents adozen, how old am I? "Thirty-four," Johnny answered unhesitatingly. The teacher replied "Well,that's not far from my actual age. Tell me...how did you guess?" "Oh, there's nothing to it,"Johnny said. "My big sister is seventeen and she's only half-crazy."

老师注意到约翰尼走神很久了，她决定吸引他的注意力。“约翰尼，”她说，“如果地球的直径是25,000英哩，鸡蛋每打买60美分，那么我多大?” “三十四，”约翰尼毫不犹豫地回答。 老师答道，“嗯，那与我的实际年龄差不多。告诉我...你是怎么猜到的?” “噢，这没什么。”约翰尼说，“我的大姐是17岁，而她有一半疯狂。”

有关于英语笑话短文：我没有看到它

Mother: I left two pieces of cake in the cupboard this morning, Johnny, and now there is onlyone piece left. Can you explain that?

母亲：约翰尼，今天早上我在食品橱里放了两块蛋糕，现在只剩下一块了，你说是怎么回事?

Johnny: Well, I suppose it was so dark that I didn't notice the other.

约翰尼：哦，我想是因为里面太黑，我没有看见另一块。