初一爆笑英文笑话大全

发布时间:2017-05-15 16:39

笑话作为一种城市化的民间口头创作体裁,是一种重要的交际手段。笑话可能只是文字游戏,但有时它在人们解决生活中的困惑时起着重要作用。小编整理了初一爆笑英文笑话,欢迎阅读!

初一爆笑英文笑话:The purpose of the propeller 飞机螺旋桨的用处

A: "What's the purpose of the propeller?"

B: "To keep the pilot cool. If you don't think so, just stop it and watch him sweat!"

A:飞机的螺旋桨有什么用?

B:为了保持飞行员凉爽。不信的话,只要停止螺旋桨转动看看飞行员会不会满头大汗。

初一爆笑英文笑话:No connection with medicine 与药无关

When the sick man entered the consulting room, the doctor smiled and said: "I am glad to see that you look much better today."

"Yes, I followed the direction on your medicine bottle," replied the sick man. The doctor asked: "What were they?"

The sick man replied: "Keep the bottle tightly corked(用软木塞塞住)."

病人走进诊室时,医生笑着说:“我很高兴你今天看起来好多了。”

“是的,我是按照你给我的药瓶上的说明做的,” 病人回答说。医生问道:“什么说明呀?”

病人回答说:“把药瓶一直用软木塞紧紧地塞住。”

初一爆笑英文笑话:An Arrogant Officer 傲慢的军官

A private didn't notice a young lieutenant and failed to salute him. The lieutenant said sternly, "You did not salute me. For this you must immediately salute one hundred times."

Just then the general came up. When he saw the poor private about to begin, he exclaimed, "What's all this?"

The lieutenant explained, "This ignoramus(无知的人) failed to salute me. I'm making his salute one hundred times as a punishment.”

"Quite right," replied the general smiling, "But do not forget, sir, that upon each occasion you are to salute return."

有个士兵没有注意到一个年轻的陆军中尉,没有向他敬礼。中尉很严厉地对那个士兵说:“你没有向我敬礼,因此你要马上敬100个礼。”

这时候将军过来了。他看到那个可怜的士兵就要开始敬礼时,就大声问道:“这是怎么啦?”

中尉解释说:“这个蠢货没有向我敬礼,我就罚他马上向我敬一百个礼。”

将军笑着说:“完全正确。不过,老弟,别忘了他向你每敬一个礼,你都要回礼的啊!”

初一爆笑英文笑话:Try the hat 试帽子

A woman was busy making an Irish stew(炖肉) when her husband came in from work, and offered to help her, "You can't help much," said the woman, "but you might get me a turnip." "What size?" asked the man. "Oh, about the size of your head," said the woman, irritably(暴躁地). The man was away for some time, and then he came back carrying a turnip. His wife received him with a broad grin. "What are you laughing at?" he asked. "Why," said the wife, "Jack Smith called to tell me that he'd seen you in the field at the back trying your hat on a lot of turnip."

一个女人在她丈夫回家的时候正忙着做爱尔兰炖肉,她的丈夫过来帮忙。“你帮不了什么忙啊”,女人说,“不过你可以递给我一个甘蓝.” “多大的?”男人问。“哦,和你脑袋一样大,”女人不耐烦地说。这个男人离开了一会,然后拿着一个甘蓝回来。他的妻子咧着嘴笑着把甘蓝接过来。“你在笑什么?”他问,“杰克史密斯打电话告诉我,他回家的时候看见你在田地里把帽子放在很多甘蓝上面试。”

初一爆笑英文笑话:Picking it to pieces 吹毛求疵

An art critic was used to criticizing very severely and in a very detailed way.

When he was commenting on one painting and then on another in the gallery, he pointed at a picture and said: "It's showing a marked lack of technique and understanding. Look! Those trees seem to have no form, and the grass has not roots. And here you see the artist had attempted to draw a fly to catch the public eye, I would not disapprove of it if he had been able to draw it better and made it like a fly. But this fly looks like a lump of mud and has not the character of a fly."

At this point while the critic was still rambling, the fly on that picture suddenly look wing and flew away.

有个美术评论家习惯于吹毛求疵。

当他在美术馆里评论一幅幅画作时,就指着一幅画说:“这幅画显得缺乏技巧和领悟,瞧!那些树看来不像样,那些草也没有跟。你们再看这里,作者还特地画了一只苍蝇来引人注意。要是他能画的更好些,使它像只苍蝇,我也不会发对。可是这只苍蝇就像一块烂泥,也没有苍蝇的特征。”

正当这位评论家还在喋喋不休地大发议论时,画上那只苍蝇忽然张开翅膀飞走了。

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