英语口语小笑话

发布时间:2017-03-18 12:01

下面是小编整理的英语口语小笑话,希望对大家有帮助。

英语口语小笑话之圣诞心愿

有个叫亚历山大的小男孩写信给圣诞老人:

“亲爱的圣诞老人,去年我收到的是一个妹妹,而不是一辆赛车。也许,另一个想得到妹妹的男童却收到了赛车。我们把那个妹妹留了下来,但现在我仍然想要一辆赛车。”

邻居的小男孩见亚历山大这样写,也赶紧给写了一封信:

“亲爱的圣诞老人,去年您虽然帮我弄到了一辆赛车,但今年我还需要一辆大一岁的新赛车。至于那个新的小妹妹,您还是留到明年送给亚历山大吧。”

英语口语小笑话:Christmas wish

Has to be called Alexander the young boy to write a letter forSanta Claus:

"Dear Santa Claus, last year I received am a younger sister, but wasnot a vehicle race. Perhaps, another wanted to obtain the youngersister the boy actually to receive the vehicle race. We have kept thatyounger sister 焉 are, but now I still wanted a vehicle race."

The neighbor young boy sees Alexander to write like this, also hurriedto give has written a letter:

"Dear Santa Claus, last year you although helped me to make a vehiclerace, but this year I also need a big year-old new vehicle race. Asfor that new little younger sister, you or will remain to the nextyear give Alexander."

英语口语小笑话之圣诞树

查理每年都向他老爸吵着要圣诞树,他老爸总是说太贵了,不想买。

今年圣诞节又到了,查理的老爸实在被他吵得头疼,于是提起斧子出了门。过了一刻钟,老爸扛着一棵大个的圣诞树回来了。查理高兴地大叫起来,“老爸,你真了不起,才花一刻钟就砍了这么大的一棵树回来!”

老爸拍拍他的后脑勺说,“傻小子,砍树哪有那么快,我是从集市上带回来的。”

查理问:“你不是嫌贵不想买的吗?”

老爸说:“没看我带了斧子吗?”

英语口语小笑话

英语口语小笑话:Christmas tree

Charlie quarrels every year to his old father is wanting theChristmas tree, his old father always said, has too expensively notwanted to buy.

This year Christmas day arrived, Charlie's old father really quarrelsby him the headache, thereupon mentioned the axe to leave the gate.Crossed the quarter of an hour, the old father carried on the shouldera big Christmas tree to come back. Charlie happily loudly cries out,"the old father, you are really great, only then spend the quarter ofan hour to chop a such big tree to come back!"

英语口语小笑话:the formula for water

An instructor in chemical warfare asked soldiers in his class: "Anyone knows the formula for water?""Sure. That's easy," said one man."What is it?""H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O.""What, what?" reasked the instructor."H to O," explained the chemistry expert.

生化战争课的老师在课堂上问士兵们:“谁知道水的分子式?”“当然,太简单了。”一个士兵回答道。“是什么?”“H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O.”“什么,什么?”老师又问道。“H to O,”化学专家解释道。

英语口语小笑话:frog 青蛙

Frog The science teacher lecturing his class in biology said, "Now I'll show you this frog in my pocket." He then reached into his pocket and pulled out a chicken sandwich. He looked puzzled for a second, thought deeply, and said, "That's funny. I distinctly remember eating my lunch."

老师正在给学生上生物课:“现在,我将要给你们看我袋子里的这只青蛙。”接着,他把手伸进口袋,却拿出了一份鸡肉三文治。老师满脸困惑地看了一眼,沉思了一会儿,说道:“真奇怪。我明明记得我已经把午饭吃掉了。”

英语口语小笑话:相亲 Blind Date

After being with her all evening, the man couldn't take another minute with his blind date. Earlier, he had secretly arranged to have a friend call him to the phone so he would have an excuse to leave.When he returned to the table, he lowered his eyes, put on a grim expression and said, "I have some bad news. My grandfather just died.""Thank heavens," his date replied. "If yours hadn't, mine would have had to!"

和盲约对象呆了一晚上后,男人再也受不了了。他事先安排了个朋友给他打电话,这样他就能借故先离开了。当他回到桌边,他垂下眼睛,装出一副阴沉的表情,说:“有个不幸的消息,我的祖父刚刚去世了。”“谢天谢地!”他的约会对象说,“如果你的祖父不死,我的祖父就得死了!”

英语口语小笑话:Lawyer and Engineer

A lawyer and an engineer were fishing in the Caribbean. The lawyer said, "I'm here because my house burned down, and the insurance company paid for everything."

"That's quite a coincidence," said the engineer. "I'm here because my house were destroyed by a flood, and my insurance company also paid for everything."

The lawyer looked somewhat confused. "How do you start a flood?" he asked.

一个律师与一个工程师在加勒比海边钓鱼。律师说:“我到这里是因为我的房子被大火烧了,保险公司赔偿了我所有的损失。”

“这太巧了,”工程师说,“我是因为房子被洪水冲垮了,保险公司也赔偿了所有的损失。”

律师看起来有些困惑,“你是怎么引起洪水的?”他不解的问。

英语口语小笑话:Lose One Pound减掉一磅

I complimented one of my co-workers on having lost ten pounds. However, I couldn't resist bragging that when I was 17, 1 weighed 225 pounds and today I tip the scales at 224. 1 added, "That's not bad for a man of my age."

Overhearing this, a woman remarked, "You mean to say it took you all this time to lose one pound?"

我称赞我的一个同事减肥10磅。可是,我禁不住夸耀说我17岁时,体重225磅,而目前体重是224磅。我还说:“这对我这样年龄的男子来说,是不错的。”

一个女子听到了这些话,她说道:“你是说你花了这么长时间才减了1磅?”

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