在日常繁忙的生活，也不要忘记了放松自己。下面小编为大家带来幽默生活英语笑话四则，希望大家喜欢!

幽默生活英语笑话：三个有趣的教授

There were three professors at the railway station. They were deep in conversation. The train had just arrived，but they didn’t notice it.Then the guard shouted，"Take your seats please !”

三位教授在火车站。他们正聚精会神地谈话。火车进站了他们都没发现。这时列车员喊道:“请上车了!”

The professors heard the guard and rushed for the train.Two of them got on the train before it moved. The third one was left behind.It was Professor Egghead. He looked worried.

教授们听到后赶紧向火车跑去，两位教授刚登上火车，火车就开动了。另一位叫艾哈德的教授没能赶上。他看上去很着急。

One of the professor's students was at the station. He tried to comfort the professor.“It wasn’t really bad，sir,”said the student. "Two out of three caught the train. That is quite good，you know.”“I know，”the professor said.“But it was my train. My friends only came to say goodbye.”

教授的一位学生也在车站等车。他尽力安慰教授。他说:“这还不是很糟，三个人有两个上了火车。您要知道这已经不错了。”教授说:“我知道，可我是来赶火车的，那两位朋友是来为我送行的。”

幽默生活英语笑话：贡献

A friend of mine, a Sunday-school teacher，attended a church dinner with her husband，who isn't much of a church一goer. The pastor asked each person to stand，introduce himself and describe his contribution. As it became apparent to the husband that everyone else was deeply involved，he grew more and more uncomfortable. But when it was his turn to speak，he rose to the occasion. Thinking of his six children，he said，"my name is Dave，and I supply the kids for the Sunday school.”

我的一位朋友是一个主日学校的教师。她和丈夫一起去参加教堂的晚餐会，而她的丈夫是不怎么去教堂的。牧师请每个人站起来做自我介绍，并讲述自己对教会的贡献。她的丈夫看出，别人都比他更关心教会的工作，他变得越来越不自在。但是，该他说话时，他很好地对付了这一局面。他想到自己有六个孩子，就说:“我叫大卫，我为主日学校提供了学生。”

He got a standing ovation.

他的话赢得一片掌声。

幽默生活英语笑话：请假

"So you want another day off,”snorted the teacher to his student，Tom.“I am anxious to hear what excuse you have this time. You have been off for your grandfather's funeral four times already.”

“这么说，你又要请一天假，”老师怒气冲冲地对他的学生汤姆说，“我倒想知道你这次找什么借口。你已经请了四次假说去参加你爷爷的葬礼。”

Tom replied，"Today my grandma is getting married again.”

汤姆回答说:“今天是我奶奶再不次举行婚礼。”

幽默生活英语笑话：数学教授

A math professor has just been knocked down by a speeding car. A police officer rushed over and asked，"Were you able to get the license number of the vehicle that hit you，sir?”

一位数学教授被一俩时速很快的车撞倒了。警察跑过去问:“先生，您能说出撞您的那辆车的车牌号码吗?”

The professor replied，"Well，not exactly，but I do recall that if the number was multiplied by itself，then divided by three，the square root of the answer would turn out to be the original number with the integers reversed.”

教授回答:“嗯，我说不准，可是我记得，如果将号码自乘，再除以三，然后开方，则平方根正好同原数的次序颠倒过来。”