高中生水平英语笑话阅读

发布时间:2017-05-13 14:22

笑话是实际生活中客观存在的,作为文学式样,它的特征是戏谑、讽刺,其功能是启迪、警示。它渊源流长、值得研究、探讨。本文是高中生水平英语笑话,希望对大家有帮助!

高中生水平英语笑话阅读

高中生水平英语笑话:Insane Dialogue

Late one night at the insane asylum one inmate shouted,"I am Napoleon!"

Another one said, "How do you know?"

The first inmate said, "God told me!"

Just then, a voice from another room shouted, "I did not!"

高中生水平英语笑话:Do You Know Your Monkey?

A man walks into a bar and orders a beer.

He takes his first sip and sets it down.

While he is looking around the bar, a monkey swings down and steals the pint of beer from him before he is able to stop the monkey.

The man asks the barman, "Who owns the monkey?"

The barman replies, "The piano player."

The man walks over to the piano player and says, "Do you know your monkey stole my beer."

The pianist replies "No, but if you hum it, I'll play it."

高中生水平英语笑话:Not Your Mama's Chili

A young cowboy walks into the town cafe. He sits at the counter and notices an old cowboy with his arms folded, staring blankly at a full bowl of chili.

After fifteen minutes of just sitting there staring at it, the young cowboy bravely asked the old cowpoke, "If you ain't gonna eat that, mind if I do?"

The older cowboy slowly turns his head toward the young wrangler and in his best cowboy manner says, "Nah, go ahead."

Eagerly, the young cowboy reaches over and slides the bowl over to his place and starts spooning in it with delight. He gets nearly down to the bottom and notices a dead mouse in the chili. The sight was shocking and he immediately barfs up the chili into the bowl.

The old cowboy quietly says, "Yep, that's as far as I got, too."

高中生水平英语笑话:Senioritis

Two elderly gentlemen from a retirement center were sitting on a bench under a tree when one turns to the other and says: "Slim, I'm 83 years old now and I'm just full of aches and pains. I know you're about my age. How do you feel?"

Slim says, "I feel just like a newborn baby."

"Really!? Like a newborn baby!?"

"Yep. No hair, no teeth, and I think I just wet my pants.

高中生水平英语笑话:Surrealists

Q: How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

A: Two. One to hold the giraffe and the other to fill the bathtub withbrightly colored machine tools.

高中生水平英语笑话:A Nerd, a Nude, and a Bike

A nerd was walking on campus one day when his friend, another nerd, rode up on anincredible shiny new bicycle. The first nerd was stunned and asked, "Where did you get such a nice bike?"

The second nerd replied, "Well, yesterday I was walking home minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up to me on this bike. She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, 'Take what you want!'"

The second nerd nodded approvingly and said, "Good choice. The clothes probably wouldn't have fit."

高中生水平英语笑话:Support a Family

The prospective father-in-law asked, "Young man, can you support a family?"

The surprised groom-to-be replied, "Well, no I was just planning to support your daughter. The rest of you will have to fend for yourselves."

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