关于2分钟初中英语笑话

发布时间:2017-05-15 11:57

冷笑话是一种新兴的语言现象,伴随着网络的普及它已经渗透到了青年群体的日常生活,偶尔爆出的一两句冷笑话能使交流氛围变得轻松愉悦,也能展示交谈者的幽默和智慧。小编分享关于2分钟初中英语笑话,希望可以帮助大家!

关于2分钟初中英语笑话

关于2分钟初中英语笑话:Dumas(仲马)

One day a man was taunting Alexandre Dumas,the greatFrench novelist,with hisancestry.

“Why,” snarled the fellow,“you are a quadroon;yourfather was a mulatto,and your grandfather was a negro.”

“Yes,” roared Dumas,“and,if you wish to know'mygreatgrandfather was a monkey. In fact, my pedigree beganwhere yours terminates.”

56.仲马

有一天,一个人在嘲弄法国大小说家亚历山大·仲马,讥笑他的祖先。

那家伙厉声说:“唔,你是四分之一黑白混血儿,你父亲是黑白混血儿,而你的祖父是个黑人。”

“是的,”仲马大声回敬:“还有呢,如果你想知道的话, 我的曾祖父是一只猴子。其实我的血统起始于你的血统终止的地方。”

关于2分钟初中英语笑话:A Life for a Life(以“命”抵命)

The English author,Richard Savage,was once living inLondon in great poverty.In order to earn a little money he hadwritten the story of his life,but not many copies of the bookhad been sold in the shops,and Savage was living from hand tomouth.As a result of his lack of food he became very ill,butafter a time,owing to the skill of the doctor who had lookedafter him,he got well again.After a week or two the doctorsent a bill to Savage for his visits, but poor Savage hadn't anymoney and couldn't pay it.The doctor waited for another month and sent the bill again. But still no money came. Afterseveral weeks he sent it to him again asking for his money.Inthe end he came to Savage's house and asked him for payment,saying to Savage,“You know you owe your life to me and Iexpected some gratitude from you.”

“I agree,” said Savage,“that I owe my life to you, and toprove to you that I am not ungrateful for your work I will givemy life to you.”With these words he handed to him two volumes entitled,The life of Richard Savage.

英国作家理查德·萨维奇一度在伦敦过着贫困潦倒的生活,为了赚几个钱,他曾写了有关他自己生平的故事。但是这部书在书店里并没有卖出几本,萨维奇过着朝不保夕的日子。由于缺乏食物,他病得很厉害。后来,由于给他治疗的那个医生的高明医术,他才又恢复了健康。过了一两个星期之后,医生给萨维奇送来了一张讨要诊费的帐单,但是贫穷的萨维奇没有钱来偿付。医生等了一个月后又送来了帐单,但仍然未索回分文。几个星期之后,他又送来帐单要钱。最后,医生本人来到了萨维奇的家中,对他说:“你明白,你是欠我一条命的,我希望你有所报答。”

“是的,”萨维奇说,“我是欠你一条命,为了向你证明我对你的诊治不是不报答,我将把我的命给你。”

说着这番话,萨维奇递给医生两卷书,名叫《理查德·萨维奇的一生》。

关于2分钟初中英语笑话:Horne Tooke(霍恩·图克)

George Ⅲ asked the once wellknown wit, Horne Tooke,whether he could play cards.

“Your Majesty,” replied Tooke,“ I am a mere childwhere cards are concerned. I cannot even tell a King from aKnave.”

乔治三世问一度大名鼎鼎的才子霍恩·图克,会不会玩纸牌。

“陛下,”图克回答说:“在玩纸牌方面,我只不过是幼儿园的水平。我甚至分不清国王和无赖。”

关于2分钟初中英语笑话:Bishop Creighton(克莱顿主教)

Creighton was going along a West End square when hesaw a little fellow trying to reach the knocker of a large house.

“Can't you reach up so high?”queried the Bishop kindly.

“No, sir,” said the small youngster.

“Well, then, let me help you,” and the Bishop mountedthe three steps and gave a splendid rattat.

The little boy glanced hastily at the gentleman of the cloth.“Come on,” he yelled,“we must boaf run nar.”

当克莱顿主教沿着伦敦西区的一个广场走着的时候,他 看见一个小家伙正试图抓住一所大房子的门环。

“你是不是够不到这么高的地方呢?”主教好意地问。

“是的,先生。”那小孩说。

“那好,让我来帮你。”主教登上那三级台阶,在门上重重扣了几下。

那个小男孩急忙给教士递上一个眼色。“快跑,”他喊着:“我们俩都得跑。”

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