幽默笑话在生活中几乎无处不在,它给人们的生活增添了不少色彩。下面小编整理了学生英语笑话，希望大家喜欢!

学生英语笑话品析

是死是活(中英)

Genuine court transcript. . .

真实的法庭记录……

Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?

问:在你解剖之前你有没有检查脉搏?

A: No.

答:没有。

Q: Did you check for blood pressure?

问:你有没有检查血压?

A: No.

答:没有。

Q: Did you check for breathing?

问:你检查呼吸情况了吗?

A: No.

答:没有。

Q: So, then it is possible that the patent was alive when you began the autopsy?

问:这么说，病人也有可能在你开始解剖前还活着。

A: No.

答:没有。

Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?

问:你怎么这么确定，医生?

A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.

答:因为他的脑子在我桌子上的一个瓶子里。

Q: But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?

问:但是病人仍然有可能还活着吗?

A: Yes，it is possible that he could have been ali

答:是的，他有可能还活着，并在某个地方正在审案子呢。

经典的学生英语笑话

县议员(中英)

An old couple was sitting down and the wife decided to strike up a conversation. She asked her husband, "Have you ever cheated on me? It is all over, so just tell me.”

一对老夫妻坐在一起时，妻子想和丈夫聊聊天就问:“你曾经骗过我吗?我们都这么大年纪了，告诉我吧。”

He answers: "No, and you.”

他回答:“没有，那你呢?”

"Well, remember that time you got fired and then rehired? Well, I visited your boss.”

“哦，还记得那次你被解雇了，然后又被重新雇用了?那是因为我去找了你的老板。”

"Is that all?" he asks.

“就这么多吗?”他问。

"No, remember that time you wanted a raise and your boss refused. I talked to the head of the company in his bed.”

“还有，记得那次你提出要加薪，但是你的老板拒绝了。我和你的老板在他的床上谈了这个问题。”

"Please tell me that is all,” asks her husband.

“请不要告诉我你还有事情骗我了，”她的丈夫说。

"No, do you remember when you ran for town legislator and you were 150 votes short?!”

“还有，你记得那次你克选县议员，你开始的时候差了一百五十票?!”

关于学生英语笑话

邮箱(中英)

A blonde went outside to check her mailbox, and her neighbor kept an eye on her, she had no mail, so she went back inside her house. Two minutes later, the same blonde went outside for the 2nd time to check her mailbox, and still，she had no mail，and the neighbor was confused. One minute later, again the woman comes outside to check her mailbox for the 3rd time, and again，she had no mail. This time, her neighbor went up to her and said, "The mailman won’t be here for another 3 more hours, why do you keep on checking your mail" The blonde said, "Oh, because my computer keeps on saying, `You've got mail.”’

一个金发女郎走出门来检查她的邮箱，她的邻居看见了她。她没有发现邮件，所以她就回到了家里。过了两分钟，这个金发女郎又出来第二次检查她的邮箱，她仍然没有发现邮件，她的邻居看见了有些迷惑。一分钟以后，这个女人又出来第三次检查邮箱，她还是一无所获。这回她的邻居走向前去问她:“邮递员三个小时内是不会来的。你为什么不断的检查你的邮箱呀?”那个金发女郎说:“噢，因为我的电脑总是告诉我‘你有新邮件’。”