笑话是内容丰富并具有出乎意料结尾的幽默口头故事。笑话几乎涵盖人们生活的所有领域,其中包括政治笑话、经济笑话、家庭生活笑话、关于民族性格的笑话等。小编精心收集了简短幽默双人英语小短文，供大家欣赏学习!

简短幽默双人英语小短文篇1

A fat man and a skinny man were arguing about who was the more polite. 一个胖子和一个瘦子在争论谁更有礼貌。

The skinny man said he was more polite because he always tipped his hat to ladies. 瘦子说他更有礼貌，因为他经常对女士摘帽示意。

But the fat man knew he was more courteous because, whenever he got up and offered his seat, two ladies could sit down.但是胖子认为他更有风度，因为无论什么时候他在车上给别人让座时，总有两位女士能坐下。

简短幽默双人英语小短文篇2

Working at the post office, I'm used to dealing with a moody public. So when one irate customer stormed my desk, I responded in my calmest voice, "What's the trouble?" "I went out this morning," she began, "and when I came home I found a card saying the mailman tried to deliver a package but no one was home. My husband was in all morning. He never heard a thing!" After apologizing, I got her parcel. "Oh, good," she gushed. "We've been waiting for this for ages." "What is it?" I asked. "My husband's new hearing aid."

我在邮局上班，对于顾客们的各种情绪早已习以为常了。所以，有一天当一个生气的顾客气冲冲地来到我的工作台时，我还是非常平静地问她，“有什么问题吗?”“我早上上街了，”女顾客说，“我回到家的时候，我看到一个卡片，卡片说邮递员要给我们家送包裹，但没人在家。可是我的丈夫整个早上都在家啊。他说他什么都没听到”。在表示了歉意之后，我把包裹给了她。“噢，太好了”，那位女顾客喜形于色。“我们等这东西都等多少年了!”“是什么好东西?”我问。“我丈夫的新助听器”。

简短幽默双人英语小短文篇3

The fine-furniture store where I work has been in business since the 1920s. Recently I received a call from a woman who wanted to replace some chairs from a dining set purchased from us in the 1930s. I assured her we could help and sought the assistance of the office manager. "You'll never believe this one, " I told him." I just got a call from a customer who bought some chairs from us in the 1930s. " Before I could finish repeating her request, he interrupted and said, "Don't tell me she hasn't received them yet!"

我所工作的精品家具商店是从20世纪二十年代以来就营业的。最近我接到一个妇女的电话。她想换一套餐具中的一些椅子。这套餐具她是在三十年代从我们这儿买的。我向她保证说我们可以帮她的忙，于是我向部门经理寻求帮助。“你永远也不会相信，”我对他说，“我刚接到一个顾客的电话，她在三十年代从我们这里买了一些椅子。” 我还没来得及说她的要求，经理就打断了我的话：“你别告诉我她到现在还没收到货!”

简短幽默双人英语小短文篇4

A husband and wife,both 91,stood before a judge,asking for a divorce."I don't understand,"He said,"Why do you want a divorce at this time of life?"the husband explained "Well , you see,We wanted to wait until the children died."

有一个丈夫和妻子都是91岁，他们站在法官面前，要求离婚。“我不明白，”法官说，“你们为什么到了这把年纪还要离婚?”丈夫解释道：“嗯，你是知道的，我们以前是哟等到孩子们都死了。”

简短幽默双人英语小短文篇5

A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.The teacher said it was physically1 impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small.The little girl stated that a whale swallowed Jonah.Irritated, the teacher reiterated2 that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah."The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?"The little girl replied, "Then you ask him."

一个小女孩和她的老师正在谈论有关鲸鱼的事情。她的老师说：“一头鲸鱼从身体构造的角度看，是不可能吞掉一个人的。因为尽管鲸鱼是一种非常巨大的哺乳动物，可它的嗓子非常小。”那个小女孩说约拿(一位西伯来先知)就是被鲸鱼吞掉的。她的老师非常生气，她再次告诉小女孩说：“从身体构造角度来讲，鲸鱼是不可能吞掉一个人的。”那个小女孩说：“那等我到了天堂，就去问问约拿。”她的老师问：“那么，假如约拿下了地狱怎么办?”那个小女孩回答：“如果是那样的话，你就去问他。”