日常生活中，语言是人们相互交流的基本工具，因此，很大一部分幽默效果都反映在语言层面上，笑话是幽默的语言表达。小编精心收集了小学简短英语笑话，供大家欣赏学习!

小学简短英语笑话：Heaven Questions

A teacher, a thief and a lawyer all die in the same freak accident. So when they reach the pearly gates, St. Peter tells them that, unfortunately, heaven is overcrowded, so they each have to answer a question correctly for admission.

The teacher is first, and St. Peter asks, "Name the famous ship that was sunk by an iceberg?" "Phew, that one's easy," says the teacher, "The Titanic." "Alright," said St.Peter, "you may pass."

Then the thief got his question: "How many died on the Titanic?" The thief replied, "That's a toughy, but fortunately I just saw the movie. The answer is 1500 people." And so he passed through.

Last, St. Peter gave the lawyer his question: "Name them."

小学简短英语笑话： The Bike Or Mary Gets It!

A little boy at Christmas time is writing to Santa. He writes, "Dear Santa, I've been a good boy all year, please can I have a bike." Then he thinks that's not quite true, so he starts again and writes, "Dear Santa, I've been good all week, please can I have a bike," but again he thinks it's not quite true, so he writes another letter.

This time he writes, "Dear Santa, I've been good all day, please can I have a bike." He's still not happy with it however and he thinks, 'Christmas isn't just about Santa.' So he runsdownstairs and grabs the toy Mary from the nativity set.

He takes the model back up to his room and writes a fourth letter. "Dear Jesus, I've gotyour mother and if you want to see her again, send me a bike."

小学简短英语笑话：Le Parfumerie Y Le Blonde

One day two blondes walk into a perfume shop. The one blonde picks up a bottle of perfume that is titled "Viens Chez Moi."The blonde asks the manager what it means, and the manager says it means, "Come to Me."So the blonde smells the perfume and asks her friend, "Does this smell like come to you? Because it doesn't smell like come to me."

小学简短英语笑话：Lights Left On

Abe, an old penny-pincher, is dying.On his deathbed, he looks up and asks, "Is my wife here?""Yes, dear," she replies. "I'm right next to you." "Are my children here?" Abe then asks. "Yes, Daddy, we're all here," one of his kids answers. "Are the rest of my relatives here?" Abe inquires. "Yes, we're all here," one says. Abe sits up and yells, "Then why the hell is the light on in the kitchen!?"

小学简短英语笑话：Brunette Meets Genie

A brunette is walking through the country, when she finds a bottle. She rubs it and, you guessed it, a genie appears.

The genie says, "You are allowed three wishes. But, I must warn you, anything you get, all the blondes in the world get twice as much."

The woman says, "Okay. Give me a nice house."

The genie replies, "You now have one nice house and all the blondes in the world have two."

The the lady says, "Give me a gorgeous man."

The genie replies, "You now have one gorgeous man, while all the blondes have two."

The lady says, "For my last wish, Genie, see that stick over there? Beat me half to death with it."