最搞笑的简单英语小笑话
前苏联著名作家高尔基说过,“哪里有人,哪里就有笑声。”笑话一般比较短小,喜剧性很强,普遍存在于人们的日常生活中。小编精心收集了最搞笑的简单英语小笑话,供大家欣赏学习!
最搞笑的简单英语小笑话:日复一日
A teacher was always so involved in the text being studied that he never looked up. He wouldcall on a student for translation and explanation, and-without realizing it-he often chose thesame student day after day. Out of respect, the student wouldn't point this out to him.
After being called on four days in a row, a student named Goldberg asked advice from hisfriends. The next day when the teacher said "Goldberg, translate and explain," Goldberg replied, "Goldberg is absent today ."
"All right," said the teacher. "You translate and explain."
一位老师对所讲课文总是非常投入,从不抬头。他常让一个学生来翻译和解释,并且不自觉地,他常日复一日地叫同一个学生。出于尊敬,学生并不给他指出这一点。
一个叫古德伯格的学生,在被一连叫了四天之后,向他的朋友寻求建议。第二天,这位教师又说:“古德伯格,翻译并解释。”古德伯格回答说:“古德伯格今天缺席。”
“那好吧,”教师说,“那就你来翻译并解释。”
最搞笑的简单英语小笑话:飞鸽传书
My husband asked me to go to the post office to mail his resume in anticipation of a job interview. He instructed me to send it the fastest way possible.
Struck by the urgency in his voice, I grabbed a handful of change and dashed out the door. Arriving at the post office, I rushed to the counter and breathlessly explained to the clerk that my envelope had to be delivered immediately . He casually weighed the envelope and said it would cost $ 10.03.I fumbled through my pockets and tallied up my coins. "But I don't have $ 10. 03, " I said. He punched some more buttons and said, "Okay, that will be $ 7. 40, ma am.
Once more I said in dismay, "Sorry, I don't have $ 7.40.
"Well," he sighed, "exactly how much do you have?"
I meekly answered, "I have exactly $ 2. 15, sir."
With that, he yelled over his shoulder to a coworker, "Hey, Charlie, get the pigeon ready.
邮政快递
我丈夫让我到邮局寄他的履历,期望能得到工作面试的机会。他告诉我要用尽可能快的方式把它寄出去。
我感到他语气紧急,就抓了一把零钱,冲出了家门。到了邮局,我冲到柜台,上气不接下气地向职员解释说我的信必须马上寄出。他漫不经心地称了一下信的重量,说邮费是十元零三分。我翻遍了我的口袋,把所有的硬币都算上。“可是我没有十元零三分,”我说。他又敲了几个键,然后说:“那好吧,七元四角,夫人。”
我又一次茫然地说:“对不起,我没有七块四。”
“那,”他叹了口气,“确切地说你有多少?”
我很谦和地回答道:“我有整整两块一角五分,先生。”
听了这话,他转过头向身后的同事喊道:“嗨,查理,准备好鸽子。”
最搞笑的简单英语小笑话:晚饭准备好了的信号
My cooking has always been the target of family jokes. One evening, as I prepared dinner a bit too quickly, the kitchen filled with smoke and the smoke detector went off. Although both of my children had received fire-safety training at school, they did not respond to the alarm. Annoyed, I stormed through the house in search of them.
I found them in the bathroom, washing their hands. Over the loud buzzing of the smoke alarm, I asked them to identify the sound.
"It's the smoke detector," they replied in unison.
"Do you know what that sound means?" I demanded.
"Sure," my oldest replied. "Dinner's ready."
我的烧饭手艺向来是家庭笑话的攻击目标。一天晚上,晚餐我准备得有点儿太快了,厨房里充满了烟,结果烟雾探查器报起警来。尽管我的两个孩子都在学校里接受过防火安全训练,可是他们并没有对报警声作出反应。我感到很恼火,满幢房子乱冲寻找他们。
我在洗漱间找到他们,发现他们正在洗手。我的声音盖过了烟雾警报的嗡嗡声,我叫他们辨别那声音。
“是烟雾探查器,”他们异口同声地说。
“你们知道那声音意味着什么吗?”我责问道。
“当然,”我的大孩子回答道,“晚饭准备好了。”
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