关于高中生英语笑话大全

发布时间:2017-05-23 11:39

笑话使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松。与此同时,笑话也是人们反对极权和专制制度的有力武器。小编精心收集了关于高中生英语笑话,供大家欣赏学习!

关于高中生英语笑话:Nursing pup

The man was in a hurry to board the airplane and didn't have time to do the paperwork to get his little doggie on board. So the man stashed the puppy down the front of his pants and snuck him on to the plane. About 30 minutes into the flight, a stewardess noticed that the man was squirming in his seat.

"Are you OK, mister?" the stewardess asked.

"Yes, I'm fine," said the man.

Time went by and again the stewardess noticed strange movements.

"Are you sure you're all right, sir?"

"Yes," the man insisted, "but I have a confession to make. I didn't have time to do the paperwork to bring my puppy on board, so I hid him down the front of my pants."

"I see," the stewardess said. "Well, as long as he's housebroken, I guess it will be OK."

"Oh, he's housebroken," the man replied. "The problem is, he's not weaned yet!"

关于高中生英语笑话:Working Dogs

Three guys sitting in a bar around a log fire with their dogs, and get talkin' about them. First one says "My dog is called woodworker.. go woodworker." The dog grabs a log from fire and with his teeth and paws fashions a beautiful figurine.

Next one says "My dog is called stoneworker.. go stoneworker" The dog drags a rock from the fire front and a beautiful carving emerges.

Third one says "My dog is called iron worker" he puts the fire tongs into the fire and gets them red hot.

"Now," he says "I'll just touch him on the balls and you watch him make a bolt for the door."

关于高中生英语笑话:Book on elephants

The UN sponsored a competition on which nation can produce the best book on elephants.The British submited a dry historical account "The Elephant and the British Empire."The French submited a text "The Sensuality of the Elephant -- a Personal Account."The Germans submited 47 Volumes entitled "An Elementary Introduction to the Foundation of the Science of the Elephant's Ear."The Americans submited an article from "Money" magazine: "Elephants -- the Perfect Tax Shelter for the 80s"Green-Peace submited a counter-entry "Elephants -- they're better than People"The Russians submited a terse manuscript titled "The superiority of the Soviet Elephant"But the Japanese won with their Promotional Flier "We have no Elephants but wouldn't you want to buy a Honda instead"

关于高中生英语笑话:Animal sounds

A librarian is working away at her desk when she notices that a chicken has come into the library and is patiently waiting in front of the desk. When the chicken sees that it has the librarian's attention, it squawks, "Book, book, book, BOOK!"

The librarian complies, putting a couple of books down in front of the chicken. The chicken quickly grabs them and disappears.

The next day, the librarian is again disturbed by the same chicken, who puts the previous day's pile of books down on the desk and again squawks, "Book, book, book, BOOK!"

The librarian shakes her head, wondering what the chicken is doing with these books, but eventually finds some more books for the chicken. The chicken disappears.

The next day, the librarian is once again disturbed by the chicken, who squawks (in a rather irritated fashion, it seems), "Book, book, book, BOOK!"

By now, the librarian's curiosity has gotten the better of her, so she gets a pile of books for the chicken, and follows the bird when it leaves the library.

She follows it through the parking lot, down the street for several blocks, and finally into a large park. The chicken disappears into a small grove of trees, and the librarian follows.

On the other side of the trees is a small marsh. The chicken has stopped on the side of the marsh. The librarian, now really curious, hurries over and sees that there is a small frog next to the chicken, examining each book, one at a time. The librarian comes within earshot just in time to hear the frog saying,

"Read it, read it, read it..."

关于高中生英语笑话:Two Rabbits

There were these two rabbits, Barry and Fred. They were being tested in a laboratory and after a few losses of hair and half of their teeth missing they decide to try and escape.

They make this great plan and the next thing they knew, they were out in the counrtyside smelling the grass and generaly having a good time.

After a bit Barry gets in a bit of a mood.

"Why are you in such a mood" says Fred.

Barry in a sulky mood says "Well you know that laboratory we were at, well I'm starting to miss that place"

Fred in disbelief says "What, are you mad. That place is a dump. I've got more injection holes on my body than pores!"

"Yeah I know " says Barry "But I'm killing for a fag."

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