笑话则映射出不同的社会生活,是各民族智慧的集中体现,反映了本民族的生活观和价值观。小编整理了正能量的英语笑话，欢迎阅读!

正能量的英语笑话篇一

A guy was driving when a policeman pulled him over. He rolled down his window and said to theofficer, "Is there a problem, Officer?"

"No problem at all. I just observed your safe driving and am pleased to award you a $5,000Safe Driver Award. Congratulations. What do you think you're going to do with the money?"

He thought for a minute and said, "Well, I guess I'll go get that drivers' license."

The lady sitting in the passenger seat said to the policeman, "Oh, don't pay attention to him —he's a smartass when he's drunk and stoned."

The guy from the back seat said, "I told you guys we wouldn't get far in a stolen car!"

At that moment, there was a knock from the trunk and a muffled voice said, "Are we over theborder yet?"

一个家伙开车的时候警察追了上来。这个家伙摇开窗户问警察：“怎么了，警官?”

“没事，我观察到了你的安全驾驶技术，很高兴你获得了价值5000美元的安全驾驶奖。祝贺你!你认为你要拿这笔钱去做什么?”

他想了一会说“哦，我觉得，我应该去考驾照”。

坐在副驾驶位的女士说"别在意他说的，他喝醉了酒说胡话呢.

“后面座位的家伙说”我告诉你，偷来的车我们走不远的。”

此时，行李箱出现了敲击声并传出一个模糊不清的声音：“我们穿过了边境了吗?”

正能量的英语笑话篇二

The cost of marriage

A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?"

And the father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying."

婚姻的成本

一个小男孩问他的父亲，“爸爸，要花多少钱才能结婚呢?”

“我也不知道，我现在还在交钱。”父亲回答。

正能量的英语笑话篇三

Contented Married Life

A man was telling one of his friends the secret of his contented married life, "My wife makes allthe small decisions," he explained, "and I make all the big ones, so we never interfere in eachother's business and never get annoyed with each other. We have no complaints and noarguments."

"That sounds reasonable," answered his friend sympathetically. "And what sort of decisionsdoes your wife make?"

"Well," answered the man, "she decides what jobs I apply for, what sort of house we live in,what furniture we have, where we go for our holidays, and things like that."

His friend was surprised. "Oh?" he said. "And what do you consider important decisions then?"

"Well," answered the man, "I decide who should be Prime Minister, whether we should increaseour help to poor countries, what we should do about the atom bomb, and things like that."

令人满意的婚姻生活

一个男人告诉他的朋友自己婚姻幸福美满的秘密，“小事都由我妻子决定，”他解释说：“而我只管大事，我们从不互相干涉，从不生对方的气。我们从来没有抱怨、没有争吵。”

“听起来很有道理，”他的朋友深有同感，“有哪些事情由你妻子作决定呢?”

“嗯，”那个人回答说：“她决定我申请什么工作，我们住什么房子，买什么家具，去哪里度假这些事情。”

他的朋友很惊奇的问道：“哦?那么你决定哪些重要事情?”

“嗯，”他回答：“我决定谁来当首相，我们是否要增加对贫困国家的援助，怎么处理原子弹等等这些问题。”