心理健康:7件快乐的人不相信的事
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7Things Happy People Don’t Believe
1. Suffering is bad.
Suffering is an inevitable condition of humanity. You cannot survive this world without at least a little suffering. Happy people know a deeper happiness comes through surviving a deep pain. We learn what we’re truly made of when faced with such hurt.
2. Life is fair.
Happiness isn’t about always getting what you want. Happy people understand that sometimes life doesn’t go their way; life isn’t fair. What they do know, is that you can only do your best, forgive yourself for what doesn’t work, and let go when you need to.
3. I’m in control of things.
As hard as you work, and as much as you try to plan it all out, you’re just not in control. You cannot control the actions or thoughts of others. In order to reach happiness, happy people accept this inevitable truth and learn to be proactive rather than reactive to life’s surprises and mishaps.
4. People are obligated to love me a specific way.
If your happiness is dependent on how other people feel about you, you will never be happy. You can’t please everyone and you certainly can’t force anyone to love you in a specific way. Happy people accept the way their loved ones feel, and work at showing their affection and asking for what they need rather than expecting people to love them the way they want to be loved.
5.Everyone hates me.
This is a toxic belief and a delusion, yet sadly a great proportion of unhappy people fall prey to this, which is largely why they are unhappy. Happy people face the world with a healthy dose of curiosity and nonchalance. They are interested in others, yet not so dependent on being loved in a specific way. Making friends takes time, that’s all.
6.I can’t.
If you believe you are incapable and let that belief keep you from happiness, then ultimately you give truth to a self-imposed fallacy. The only way to improve and succeed at anything is to try and try again. Consider this: who is your idol? Do you think he or she is so accomplished through a life void of failure? No! They simply do not let their doubts keep them from happiness.
7.I have something to prove.
Unhappy people seek happiness through approval. Unfortunately, that approval is impossible to achieve because it is caused by a inner lack, which keeps them constantly striving. Happiness can only be achieved through self-acceptance. Yours is the only approval you need.
7件快乐的人不相信的事
痛苦是不好的。
苦难人类是不可避免的条件。你至少没有点痛苦无法生存在这个世界。快乐的人知道更深层的幸福来自于在沉痛中幸存。当面对这样的痛苦时我们知道我们真正做了什么。
生活是公平的
幸福不是总是得到你想要的。快乐的人明白,生活有时候不走他们的路,生活是不公平的。他们所知道的是,你只能做你最好的,原谅自己不能做到的,当你需要的时候放手。
我在控制世事。
像你一样努力工作,尽可能多的你想全力以赴计划这一切,你只是控制不了。你不能控制别人的行为或想法。为了得到幸福,快乐的人接受这一不可避免的事实,学会积极主动而不是被动的承受生活的惊喜和意外。
人们有义务以一个特定的方式爱我。
如果你的幸福取决于于别人对你的感觉如何,你永远不会快乐。你不可能讨好每一个人,你当然也不能强迫任何人以一个特定的方式去爱你。快乐的人接受亲人的感觉,和致力于表现他们的情感和寻找他们需要什么,而不是希望人们以他们想要被爱的方式爱他们。
每个人都讨厌我。
这是一个有毒的信念和一种错觉,但遗憾的是大多数的不幸福的人深受其害,这在很大程度上反映了为什么他们不开心。快乐的人以好奇心和冷静面对世界的。他们对其他人感兴趣,但不依赖于以一个特定的方式被爱。交朋友需要时间,仅此而已。
我不行。
如果你认为你不行,让这信念让你远离幸福,那么最终你会被自我真理误导。唯一的改进和成功的途径是对任何事都再试一次。想想看:你的偶像是谁?你认为他或她的成功是通过没有失败的生活吗?不!他们只是不让他们的疑虑阻止他们远离幸福。
我有事情要证明。
不幸福的人从认可中寻求幸福。不幸的是,认可是不可能实现的,因为它是由内部缺乏而产生,这使他们不断奋斗。幸福只能通过自我肯定。你是唯一需要得到自己认可的人。
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