简短搞笑的英语小笑话

发布时间:2017-06-08 11:29

一位著名的心理学家说,最好的笑话是文字游戏。不仅能够让人发笑,还富有趣味性。小编精心收集了简短搞笑的英语小笑话,供大家欣赏学习!

简短搞笑的英语小笑话

简短搞笑的英语小笑话:Early Shopper

It was Christmas and the judge was in a benevolent mood as he questioned the prisoner. "What are you charged with?" he asked.

"Doing my christmas shopping early," replied the defendant.

"That's no offense," replied the judge, "How early were you doing this shopping?"

"Before the store opened," countered the prisoner.

采购过早

那天是圣诞节,法官在审讯犯人时也有点恻隐之心。“你为什么而被起诉?”他问。

“采购圣诞节物品过早。”被告答。

“这不算犯法,”法官回答,“你购物多早?”

在商店开门之前,“犯人应道。

简短搞笑的英语小笑话:Midway Tactics

Three competing store owners rented adjoining shops in a mall. Observers waited for mayhemto ensue.

The retailer on the right put up huge signs saying, "Gigantic Sale!" and "Super Bargains!"

The store on the left raised bigger signs proclaiming, "Prices Slashed!" and "FantasticDiscounts!"

The owner in the middle then prepared a large sign that simply stated, "ENTRANCE".

中间战术

三个互相争生意的商店老板在一条商业街上租用了毗邻的店铺。旁观者等着瞧好戏。

右边的零售商挂起了巨大的招牌,上书:“大减价!”“特便宜!”

左边的商店挂出了更大的招牌,声称:“大砍价!”“大折扣!”

中间的商人随后准备了一个大招牌,上面只简单地写着:“入口处”。

简短搞笑的英语小笑话:款待Treat

As a rookie in the Atlantic City, N.J., Police department, I was assigned a beat on theboardwalk. Hardly a day went by when I didn't come upon a child who had become separatedfrom his parents.

One afternoon, I spotted a small boy standing alone, obviously lost. I tried to gain hisconfidence - I took him to the nearest ice-cream stand and bought him a cone. Time passedwith no sign of the boy's parents, so the next step was to call for a patrol car to take him toheadquarters. I told the small fry to stay put while I went to the call box. When I returned, hewas nowhere in sight.

Within minutes, the car arrived, and one of the patrolmen asked me where the child was. I feltstupid; it's humiliating to say you've lost a lost child. But I told the officers what had happenedand gave a description of the boy. "What did you treat him?" asked one of the men.

"An ice-cream cone. Why?"

"Because," answered the officer, "that kid lives only a few blocks from here, and you've aboutthe fifth rookie he's conned for a treat!"

我是新泽西州大西洋城警察局的一名新警察。我被指派巡逻一条海滨的路线,几乎每天都能碰上与父母走散的孩子。

一天下午,我发现一个小孩独自站在那里,显然是迷了路。我先是设法取得他的信任-我带他到附近的冰淇淋摊给他买了一个蛋筒。过了很长时间,也没看见他父母的影子,所以我就准备打电话叫辆巡逻车将他送回总部去。我告诉他站在那里别动,我去电话亭打电话。当我回来时,却发现他不知道到哪儿去了。

警车很快来了。一名警察问我小孩在哪里。我感觉自己傻极了,说自己弄丢了一个迷路的小孩,该多丢人啊!但我还是告诉了警察们所发生的一切,并描述了一下小孩的长相。“你请他吃了什么?”一名警察问。

“一个冰淇淋蛋筒。怎么啦?”

“因为,”那名警察说,“那个小孩住的地方离这儿只隔几个街区。而你大概是新警察中帮他买东西吃的第五个傻瓜蛋!”

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