在交际场合,能恰到好处地讲个笑话或自创一个幽默,不仅可以体现自己的语言水平,还可以提升个人魅力。小编分享关于简单的英语笑话带翻译，希望可以帮助大家!

关于简单的英语笑话带翻译：I'm not even thirsty 我一点都不渴

Nearing the end, Stanislaw is surrounded by loved ones. As the final moment approaches, he gathers all his strength and whispers, "I must tell you my greatest secret." His family urges him to go on.

"Before I got married, I had it all," Stanislaw explains. "Fast cars, cute girls, and plenty of money. But a good friend warned me, 'Get married and start a family. Otherwise, no one will be there to give you a glass of water to drink when you're on your deathbed.' So I took his advice. I traded the girls for a wife, beer for baby food. I sold my Ferrari and invested in college funds. And now here we are. And you know what?"

"What?"

"I'm not even thirsty!"

临死之前，斯坦尼斯被他挚爱的家人包围着。知道自己的最后时刻就要来了，他拿出所有力气，轻声耳语，“我必须告诉你们一个最大的秘密。”他的家人催他赶紧说。

斯坦尼斯说，“在我结婚之前，我什么都有：靓车，美女，还有大把大把的钱。但是一个好朋友警告我说，‘你应该结婚，建立一个家庭，否则当你奄奄一息躺在床上时，都没个人会为你端茶倒水。’于是我听取了他的建议，离开了姑娘们，娶了一个妻子。我不再把钱花在啤酒上，而是留下来给孩子们买吃的。我卖掉了我的法拉利，投资了大学基金。所以现在才有了你们。可你们知道吗?”

“知道什么?”

“我现在一点都不渴啊!”

关于简单的英语笑话带翻译：Who is he waiting for 他在等谁

Two friends were having lunch at a café in new York's Grand Central Terminal. They noticed a man sitting alone at an adjoining table. When the waitress approached him, they overheard her ask, "Are you waiting to be joined by a tall, thin woman with long, blond hair?" He answered, "In the large scheme of my life, yes, but today I'm meeting my wife." 两个朋友在纽约市汽车中心总站的一家咖啡厅里吃午饭。 他们注意到一个男人独自坐在邻桌。当服务员小姐走向他时，无意中听到她问那个男人：“你是在等一位个子很高，很瘦，留长发，皮肤很白的金发女人吗?” 那人回答说：“在我生活的长远规划中，我是在等。但是今天，我却是在等我的妻子。”

关于简单的英语笑话带翻译：Keys? Kiss?

A friend of mine was giving an English lesson to a class of adult who had recently come to live in the United States. After placing quite a number of everyday objects on a table, he asked various members of the class to give him the ruler, the book, the pen and so on. The class went verysmoothly and the students seemed interested and serious about the work that they were engaged in until when my friend turned to an Italian student and said, "Give me the kays." The man looked surprised and somewhat at a loss. Seeing this, my friend thought that the student hadn't heard him clearly, so he repeated. "Give me the kays." The Italian shrugged his shoulders. Then, he threw his arms around the teacher's neck and kissed him on both cheeks.

我的一位朋友在给一个成人学生班级上英语课。他们都是新近来美国生活的。在一张桌子上摆了许多日常用品之后，他请全班同学给他挑出尺子，书本，钢笔等。课进行得井然有序，学生们对自己所做的似乎很感兴趣，也很认真。后来轮到一名来自意大利的学生，我的朋友说：“给我钥匙。”那人看起来非常吃惊，也有点手足无措。看到这种情况，我的朋友想是他没有听清楚，于是又重复了一遍：“给我钥匙。”那位意大利学生耸了耸肩。接着，他伸出胳膊搂住老师的脖子在双颊上亲了两下。

关于简单的英语笑话带翻译：A white lie 善意的谎言

A middle-aged couple went to the gallery.

The wife who was nearsighted, stood in front of a mirror at the entrance, which she thought that it was a picture, and she saw a woman's image and cried out, "Dear me, how could a woman be so ugly?"

"Don't be so fussy," said the husband. "It's lucky that it is not a mirror and it's a picture."

一对中年夫妻来到画廊。

妻子是近视眼，她站到了入口处的镜子面前，她以为这面镜子是一幅画。她看到了一张女人的肖像，惊呼道：“天呐，天下竟然有这样丑陋的女人。”

“别大惊小怪，”她的丈夫说，“还好那是一张画，而不是一面镜子。”