轻松生活英语趣味故事

发布时间:2017-03-19 13:46

“哪里有人,哪里就有笑声。”从古到今,笑话是人们生活中不可缺少的“调剂品”。笑话使人们在刻板的生活中感到一丝快意和放松,在人们的日常生活中起着重要调剂作用。下面小编为大家带来轻松生活英语趣味故事,欢迎大家阅读!

轻松生活英语趣味故事:那只鸡实在是美味啊

There was a little old lady who was nearly blind, and she had three sons who wanted to prove which one was the best to her.

Son 1 bought her a 15-room mansion, thinking this would surely be the best that any of them could offer her.

Son 2 bought her a beautiful Mercedes with a chauffeur(司机) included, thinking this would surely win her approval.

Son 3 had to do something even better, so he bought her a parrot that he had been training for 15 years to memorize the entire Bible. You could ask the parrot any verse in the Bible, and he could quote it word for word. What a gift that would be.

Well, the old lady went to the first son and said, "Son, the house is just gorgeous, but it's really much too big for me. I only live in one room, and it's too large to clean and take care of. I really don't need the house, but thank you anyway." Then she confronted her second son with, "Son, the car is beautiful. It has everything you could ever want on it, but I don't drive and really don't like the chauffeur, so please return the car."

Next, she went to Son 3 and said, "Son, I just want to thank you for your most thoughtful gift. That chicken was delicious."

从前有一个近乎失明的小老太,她有三个儿子,每一个都想向母亲证明自己对她最好。

第一个儿子为她买下一栋有15个房间的大屋,他觉得这是对母亲最好的孝顺方式,其他兄弟都比不上。

二儿子为她买了一辆漂亮的奔驰,还配了个司机。他也觉得他一定会赢了。

老三为母亲买了一只鹦鹉。这只鹦鹉接受了15年的训练,能一字不落地背诵整部圣经,并且不论你问他什么,他都能从圣经里原句引出。

这位老太太对他的第一个儿子说:“孩子,你买的房子很棒。但是它太大了,我只能睡一间屋,还要花时间去 打理剩下的房间,谢谢你,但我实在不需要它。”接着她对二儿子说:“你的车也很好,再不能找到比那更棒的车了,但我不会开车,也不喜欢那个司机,所以你把它拿去推了吧!”

最后,她对她的小儿子说:“孩子,我要感谢你最棒的礼物!那只鸡实在是美味啊!”

轻松生活英语趣味故事:午饭是他自个做的

An Irishman, a Mexican and a blonde guy were doing construction work on the 30th floor of a building.

The Irishman opened his lunch box and said, "Corned beef and cabbage! If I get corned beef and cabbage one more time for lunch I'm going to jump off this building."

The Mexican opened his lunch box and exclaimed, "burritos again! If I get burritos one more time I'm going to jump off, too."

The blonde opened his lunch and said, "Bologna again. If I get a bologna sandwich one more time I'm jumping too."

Next day the Irishman opens his lunch b box, sees corned beef and cabbage and jumps to his death. The Mexican opens his lunch, sees a burrito and jumps too, the blonde opens his lunch, sees the bologna and jumps to his death also.

At the funeral, the Irishman's wife is weeping, she says, "if I'd known how really tired he was of corned beef and cabbage I never would have given it to him again!" the Mexican's wife also weeps and says, "I could have given him tacos or enchiladas! I didn't realize he hated burritos so much." Everyone turned and stared at the blonde's wife. "Hey, don't look at me," She said. "He made his own lunch."

一个爱尔兰人,一个墨西哥人和一个金发男子在一栋楼房的第三十层施工。

爱尔兰人打开饭盒说:“咸牛肉和卷心菜!下次午饭还吃咸牛肉和卷心菜,我就从这楼上跳下去。”

墨西哥人打开饭盒说:“又是玉米煎饼。下次如果还是玉米煎饼,我也跳下去。”

金发人打开饭盒说:“又是大腊肠。下次如果还是大腊肠三明治,我也跳下去。”

第二天,爱尔兰人打开盒饭看到咸牛肉和卷心菜便跳楼死了。墨西哥人打开饭盒看到玉米煎饼也跳了楼,金发人打开饭盒看到大腊肠也跳楼自杀了。

葬礼上,爱尔兰人的妻子在哭泣,她说:“如果我知道他如此讨厌咸牛肉和卷心菜,我决不会再给他吃!”墨西哥人的妻子也在哭泣着说:“我会给他做玉米面豆卷和春卷!我没有发现他是这么不喜欢吃玉米煎饼。”每个人都把目光转向金发男子的妻子并盯着她看。“嘿,别看我,午饭是他自个做的。”她说。

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