笑话内含着丑与美的矛盾冲突,反映了严肃主题,充满平民大众朴素的审美理想。下面是小编带来的令人喷饭的英语笑话，欢迎阅读!

令人喷饭的英语笑话篇一

Mental deficiency 智力缺陷

"Would you mind telling me, Doctor," Bob asked ..."how you detect a mental deficiency in somebody who appears completely normal?" "Nothing is easier," he replied.

“医生，你能不能告诉我，”鲍勃问，“对于一个看上去很正常的人，你是怎样判断出他有智力缺陷的呢?”“再没有比这容易的了，”医生回答，

"You ask him a simple question which everyone should answer with no trouble. If he hesitates, that puts you on the track." " Well, What sort of question?"

“问他一个简单的问题，简单到所有人都知道答案，如果他回答得不干脆，那你就知道是怎么回事了。”“那要问什么样的问题呢?”

"Well, you might ask him, 'Captain Cook made three trips around the world and died during one of them.

“嗯，你可以这样问，‘库克船长环球旅行了三次，但是在其中一次的途中他去世了，

Which one?' Bob thought for a moment, and then said with a nervous laugh, "You wouldn't happen to have another example would you? I must confess I don't know much about history."

是哪一次呢?’”鲍勃想了一会儿，紧张的回答道，“你就不能问另外一个问题吗?坦率地说，我对历史了解的不是很多。”

令人喷饭的英语笑话篇二

Modern chivalry 现代骑士精神

Sitting in his cab waiting for a fare, my friend's husband, William,watched as a torrential downpour left lake-size puddlesjust off the curb of the busy street.

我朋友的丈夫William(是一名出租车司机)，此时正坐在车里等着一名顾客付钱，同时，看着倾盆而下的大雨在那条忙碌的街道边上留下一些犹如湖一般大小的水洼。

Then the back door opened and a customer got in.

这时，车的后座门开了，一位顾客钻了进来。

As William asked the destination,the would-be passenger exited through the other door,successfully avoiding the puddles.

当William问她要到哪时，这名准乘客从车的另一扇门下去了，成功地躲开了那些水洼。

"Thanks," she said. "Chivalry isn't dead after all."

“谢谢”，女乘客说。“看来骑士精神毕竟还没有死”。

令人喷饭的英语笑话篇三

Morning sickness 晨起反应

The neighbor dropped in on a friendand found her sitting at the kitchen table,staring blankly at a half-empty cup of coffee,her three kids squabbling loudly in the other room.

一个邻居顺道去拜访自己的一位朋友，发现她正呆坐在厨房的桌子旁，眼睛茫然地盯着已经喝了一半的咖啡，她的三个孩子正在隔壁的房间里大声地喧哗。

"What's wrong ?" she asked.The friend told her that she had "morning sickness".

“怎么了?”她问。朋友告诉她自己不过是有点“晨起反应”。

Surprised the neighbor said,"I didn't even know you were pregnant."

邻居非常吃惊，说，“我甚至都不知道你又怀孕了!

"I'm not." the harried young woman replied."I'm just sick of mornings."

“哦，我没有怀孕，”年轻的妇人苦恼地回答，“我只是腻烦透了早上而已!”

令人喷饭的英语笑话篇四

My mother doesn't look like that 我妈妈不是那样子的

While doing renovations in our house,one of the workmen paused to look at a flattering photo of mewearing makeup and a fancy gown.

在给我们家房子做翻新的时候，一个工人停下手中的活来看我的一张盛装照片，照片中的我化了妆，穿着名贵的晚礼服。

I heard him let out a low whistle and ask my son, Joshua,"Who's that?""That's my mom," Joshua answered.

我听到他小声地吹了一声口哨，然后问我的儿子Joshua，“那人是谁?”“那是我妈”，Joshua回答。

"Wow," the man said, "my mother doesn't look like that.""Yeah," my son said, "well, neither does mine."

“哇”，那男人说，“我妈可不是这样子的”。“可不”，我儿子说，“呃，我妈也不是那样子的。”